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Do it again!

Seasons have a way of slipping by so fast that I barely have time to catch my breath before the next one comes and goes. In spite of all the new things and changes, this spring and summer has had a rhythm and theme that I think may become a part of my life for longer than a season.

I have thought a lot about dreams this year. And resurrection. Yes, I know that Easter has come and gone, but the message of Easter has been in my mind and heart ever since.

Sometimes I think God takes our best dreams and gifts and thwarts them on purpose. Ever had those times in life where it seemed like every time you turned around something new and horrible happened until you feel like shaking your fist at heaven and yelling,

"Do you see me down here? I am not able to accomplish anything besides make a grand mess. Everything I try dies!"

And the reply I hear is "That's the point. Let it die."

"What?"

It is a fact that a grain of wheat must fall to the ground and die before …

Like A Duck In The Rain

Click on this link, it will take you to the song I have been listening to for the last year. I've made this song my prayer and watched God do some pretty amazing things. 
Thirst - Phil Wickham

Today was a good day. It was a duck in the rain, and mud puddle, spring break sort of day. It started out with me cleaning my kitchen. Yes, very practical, but also rewarding. I had a little bit of time to spare this morning so I sat down at my keyboard and played until something worth recording came. It was different than anything I've ever recorded before. I had been planning to write something that I could see myself singing to God as a worship song. As I was thinking and praying about it, He flipped it on me and I felt like He wanted to me to remember and think about His love for me. The words that drifted through my mind as I was playing went like this:
"There's a place that My heart longs to go,
There's a heart that I want to know,
A voice that I want to hear, and it…

The road home

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It has been a very long time since I have written anything for a blog. It is amazing how many things can change in a year and it is hard to believe that nearly a year has passed since Tara, Heather and I moved into our little house.
I remember moving in. It was a very chaotic experience. Moving always is. But to make matters worse, that was also the week I worked 55 hours, completed a large homework assignment, was sick, and played music for my cousins wedding. Looking back on it now, I don't remember a lot of specifics, only that the house was a mess, and I was tired. I was tired and sickish for the next month. I also spent a lot of time crying and wondering if things would eventually get better...
It seemed like things would never settle into any sort of normal. At work we were busy trying to implement a new software system that just plain out didn't work. We didn't have enough merchandise, placing orders was a long and painful ordeal, taking calls from frustrated custo…

Coffee, Friends, and Other Small Graces

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Spring has turned into summer; the fields and hills now have a summer-ish brown color layered over the brilliant green of spring.


Tonight fireflies blink their lights at the night making the dark seem less lonely and more like my own personal galaxy. They are tiny stars that flash all around me. If I lay on my back I can see up to a brilliant display of stars that seem to go on for infinity. One phrase I will probably never get over is that little section of that verse in Genesis that says "And He made the stars also." Those enormously huge masses of hot, burning noxious gasses that glow in all colors imaginable - so much bigger than the earth. Like He just flung them out into space as an after-thought. Wow.


 I wiggle my toes in the bare earth and contemplate how good life feels right now. I have so much more than I deserve, so much more than I ever dreamed I would. So often its not that we don't dream, although there are those times. A lot of the time it's that we…
I've been having some different thoughts that last few weeks.
The thought that provided some extra food for thought today was this one: love is not about being nice, measuring up to expectations, treating other people well, or deciding to be a "good Christian," love is simply choosing to care about other people (their heart, their well-being, their dreams) above and beyond looking out for #1 (myself). For me that simplified a lot of things. It's not ever going to be about making myself nicer or even being a better person, not that those things aren't important, because they are. But the most important thing is to be a channel. I open myself (my heart and life) to experience the fullness of who He (Jesus) is and then let that redefine everything. His love will flow through my life and reshape everything, spill over the banks and into the lives of others. So much easier than trying and trying to measure up and be better!
Things, circumstances, life has changed a l…

The one about spider webs, faith, and banana peels

You know those days. We all have them. The days when it feels like you have one foot in the grave of your dying dreams and the other foot on a banana peel. The times when you beg God to come with the jaws of life and gloriously save you from what feels like a deadly and painful situation. And God answers. He sends you a spider web (faith, and hope) to hold onto while you monkey bar your way across the Grand Canyon (the situation). Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor - make that a sense of irony, actually.

I started out this year pumped about all of the positive changes I was going to make in my life, and excited about all of the new possibilities I saw in my future. I was planning to enroll at Full Sail University, and begin studying music production this fall. I was going to take some computer classes and get a higher paying job. I was going to write all kinds of new songs. I was going to be a super friendly person with the magnetic personality and inspire other people to…

Imperfect Worshippers

A couple weeks ago our discussion in church centered around this question: are you a worshipper? And if you are, why?
     I've been thinking about that off and on ever since. Our family discussion after church led us to the conclusion that we are imperfect worshippers because although our hearts are open to God in every way that we know how to be, He is always asking permission to take over new parts of our hearts and lives that before were unclaimed or claimed by things other than Himself.
      This is so much what my journey has been, all along. What do I value, and why? What do I bring as my offering to Him and why do I bring it? Over the last three years everything that I have deemed valuable or worth something has been tried and tested in more ways than I can count. Sometimes the only thing that I feel that I can bring  to Jesus is my mess and the choices that I make everyday, be they good or bad.
     Another thing that I have been thinking and learning about is God&#…